That Wasn't So Hard!

After feeling a bit overwhelmed by Haddon's upcoming evaluation, the Lord truly provided in many ways:

1. He allowed for Casey to go up with me by stirring my sister-in-law's heart to offer to take our daughter for the day while we both went up to Portland. This ended up being a much needed gesture, and I didn't even know it! We hit some pretty big traffic jams on the way up, and were a bit late. We also had to figure out which building we needed to be in as the medical center where we were going was very large! Two heads were way better than one frazzled one!

2. He opened up the ears of the panel of 5 specialists we dealt with that day. They were able to delight in and enjoy our son as well.

3. Because they listened, and because I know that prayers were with us that day, they didn't feel comfortable labeling our son with autism. This is a great praise. It's something that we will continue to look at depending on Haddon's growth is areas of concern, but one of our biggest fears was the tendency to want to just put a label on children.

4. Casey, Haddon and I got to spend a good portion of that day together, just the three of us. That is something that doesn't happen too much, and it seems like, though he was worn out, Haddon really liked having mommy and daddy all to himself.

All in all, there wasn't anything discovered that we don't already know about our son. One of the reasons to have this particular evaluation was to work with insurance in getting referrals necessary to get the help that we feel our son needs. Something that was kind of interesting was the order that one doctor put in for a blood test to be done for Haddon. She wanted to cover all the bases by screening him to make sure there are no chromosomal issues. This isn't something that worries us or bothers us- it's just interesting, and we'll see how that goes when the time comes.

So, praise be to God that it wasn't so hard! He always provides perfectly, and by His grace we'll continue to be given the wisdom in how to help our sweet boy. We truly love him just the way he is, and we will do everything we can to help him grow and learn.

Thank you for your prayers and support. Please continue to pray for us as we are advocates for our boy.

Harder

Today is Tuesday. Tomorrow is Wednesday. Then it is Thursday.

I have been thinking about Thursday for a while. Thursday was supposed to happen two months ago, and it has to happen now instead.

Thursday is a day that I am reluctant about, and yet think it's time to do. Thursday was pushed on me, and I resisted. Then we decided that Thursday would happen in our own way.

As Thursday comes, I'm having a harder time with it than I thought I would. I'm pretty emotional.

So what is Thursday?

Early that morning we will take our sweet boy up to Portland and have a three-hour evaluation. People who don't know him are going to try and interact with him and help him play "games" and see if he shows true symptoms of autism. They are, hopefully, going to listen to us and take our observations into account. They are going to read what others have written, and then talk with us about what they think- because they are supposed to be experts.

Thursday has been played down in my mind, but really, now that it's close, I'm feeling like it's kind of big. I don't want our boy labeled with something that is inaccurate.

I love our son just the way he is.

I love our son too much to not help him grow as I know he can.

So Thursday is close. I'm nervous. It's a bit harder than I expected.

But God has already ordained Thursday. He's ordained all who our son is and all that he will be. So as hard as it is to face Thursday, it won't be as hard as it would be if I didn't know the Solid Rock that is harder than any Thursday.

Not Me! Monday!: When Life Hands You Lemon Cake...

Welcome to another installment of Not Me! Monday! This is a blog carnival created by another fun-loving mom, MckMama. Go visit her blog to find out what other's are not doing!

As the Stutzman family prepared for one of their biggest fundraising events for their Ethiopian adoption, I thought that I would be extra helpful. You see, they were hosting a silent suction and dessert. So, of course, I was taking some dessert.

I certainly didn't think that I would be even more awesome if I not only made layer bars, but also a lemon cake- of which the ingredients were just hanging around the cupboards. I didn't proceed to make the cake, having every confidence that it would turn out beautifully. And I furthermore didn't imagine how I would decorate it specially so that it looked even more tantillizing than it most likely already would look. I didn't imagine lines of people oo-ing and aw-ing over the cake's beauty as it sat in my cake platter. Not me!

After baking this cake, and getting ready to "flip" it out of the round pan, I didn't run into trouble. Nope. No, I didn't.

It didn't stick to the pan at all. Nope. It didn't.

It didn't crumble. Nope. It didn't.

I didn't try to piece it together, desperately trying to cover up any flaws in hopes of still creating the magnificent cake. I didn't imagine what a great victory it would be to overcome said flaws, and still make a beautiful masterpiece. Nope. I'm not that delusional!

The second cake round didn't behave exactly as the first. Nope. It didn't.

Even after that, I didn't still believe that cake would be beautiful... uh, no, really, I didn't! Not me!

After frosting the first layer and placing the second on top, I didn't still believe that despite the crumbling cake could still look presentable to actually charge people to taste! Nope!

Finally, reality didn't hit me. I didn't laugh at my stupidity and foolishness. Nah. Because all of this didn't happen, right?

RIGHT?!?